If you follow me on Instagram , you know every weekend I binge watch some of the newest, hottest shows or movies on Netflix. A couple of weeks ago, my mom told me to watch a show her friend’s daughter worked on. Before I even had to look it up, it popped up on my Netflix feed. My weekend was a wrap. I was ALL IN.
Indian Matchmaker is about a marriage consultant Sima Taparia who is based in India but travels the world pairing up single Indian men and women. With parents and extended family involved, the process is pretty extensive to find a match. They break down wants/needs which considers height, skin tone, family background, education, career and more.
Each episode starts with Indian couples who have been married awhile that were arranged and seemingly living happily ever after. I actually really enjoyed this as going into this show, I believe (and still do ) that many arranged marriages actually work and you grow to love this once stranger.
Let’s start with my breakdown of the cast:
Aparna — okay at first glance I was thinking “Oh, I love Aparna. I could totally hang with her”. Her directness I was immediately drawn to… until I wasn’t lol. My desire to be her friend in my head turned to, “Whew chile! It’s going to be tough for her future” husband”.
When seeing Aparna on dates, you could completely see her unwillingness to get to know some guys, she got turned off quickly, and she couldn’t even fake it to have a good time. Now… at the same time, are you required to fake having a good time on a date or at least half-way smile from time to time? No. She’s just a tough cookie. Honestly I think she needs a guy that’s more direct than her and that can keep up with her.
Firstly, the match maker I don’t think did the best job with matching her. I could tell immediately on the first date that she just picked someone SHE thought would work versus someone Aparna would like- so that was a big part of it. When you are paying someone – I guess it makes sense for your criteria to actually be acknowledged in the match makers picks.
Nadia was my girl from minute one and still is. I definitely want to hang with her lol. She was extremely relatable, beautiful, smart, and just overall likable. Nadia seems like a genuinely nice person who just has been unlucky at love. The matchmaker did a great job I thought picking potentials — but at the same time , Nadia was just such a bright light that I think she would get along with pretty much any guy.
Vyasar- Loved his personality. His background was different than the rest of the cast. He is a guidance counselor and didn’t make a ton of money, hence his first match ending it citing that being “nice” won’t help pay the bills in the future ( I’m with you girl!!) To me this goes with bad match making. It appears Indian Matchmaking is super traditional so the man would be making more money so I could tell it wasn’t going to work.
He did end up meeting a fun lady who recently graduated from veterinary school who I thought was a great match. She’ll make more money than him, but she honestly gave me the vibe that she wouldn’t care about that. She gave me new-school vibe where that might not be a concern.
Akshay- This family seemed super traditional. He honestly didn’t seem like he was into it and his personality appeared super dry to me. This could’ve been due to him letting his parents lead. Out of all the men and women on the show, he was the one that let his mom completely take over. When asked what he desired in a wife , he looked to his mom for direction.
He ended up meeting a beautiful woman and family and they planned to get married. Apparently they called it off. If you ask me, she probably dodged a bullet. She wanted to work and he said he wanted a wife like his mom- to stay at home. On paper they looked good though. He cited that they couldn’t have a convo more than 5 minutes. Ummm, that was you boo! You were boring. She had to lead the initial conversation so I already knew it was a wrap.
Pradhyman was good looking and the “cool kid” of the bunch, but honestly didn’t seem interested in the process or finding a wife. He had been presented with over 100 women — clearly he’s a picky one. I wasn’t too invested in him on this show but he had a nice lifestyle so that was fun to look at. I could tell he would have to find an extraordinary good-looking woman to even catch a glimpse of his interest. He did meet one but apparently that didn’t work out. Honestly I just think he wasn’t ready.
Ankita! Okay now honestly this storyline bothered me the most. According to this show and articles I have read, many Indians prefer fair, tall and thin women- Ankita doesn’t fall into any of those physical traits. Honestly — she falls into the “undesirable” category because she is “overweight”. She’s averaged size honestly. She’s super cute, but I guess for standards of certain Indian families— she is deemed not marriage material.
Even though successful in her denim brand business and seems to have a good personality, her insecurities shown through. Who wouldn’t though if they grew up being told their weight will keep them from finding a husband? It was kind of cringy to watch.
Aside from Nadia, she was another favorite. I had so much empathy for her. She was just being herself and unapologetically. I hope she finds her one.
Rupam- The only divorcee and a single parent. I knew this one would be tough. Her dad was along for the ride and he was actually very picky even though he knew his daughter wasn’t necessarily “desirable”. They ended up trying to pair her with other single parents. I’m actually shocked they even attempted to do an arranged second marriage. I’m not sure how her story ended.
All in all, I absolutely loved this show. It gave me as a Black woman insight on this cultural experience that has been around for centuries. I totally would love to be in an arranged marriage. I loved the families involvement and I honestly do believe you can grow to love someone.
I don’t believe love is strong enough to sustain a marriage – love can fade. I believe in the power of marrying two strong families together that can create generational wealth. I get it and understand why they do it , it’s just some “flaws” in the system according to today’s standard- who makes more money, colorism, and fat-shaming.
This all got me wondering, would I let my parents select my spouse?
What were your thoughts on the show?
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